I’ve decided to overshare

So here we are. It’s 2024 and I’m starting a blog.

If that alone isn’t cause for concern…

I’m starting a BLOG about my RECORDING STUDIO in 2024.

Joke’s on you though, you’re the one reading it.

I’ve been thinking a lot about journaling recently. So the more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea of sitting on my laptop in front of the TV, and spewing out whatever comes to mind.

I do love the idea of making this more interactive than a weekly dose of one-way verbal Diarrhea. But.. Baby steps.

This year my partner, Chloe, and I have watched a lot of sport. Especially the Olympics.

I’ve been wondering if the athletes could appreciate the gravity of their achievement in the moment. Or does all the stress and focus mean it only dawns on you when it’s over?

While we were watching the basketball I opened an email from my accountant. My tax return documents are back…

My first profitable year as a musician.

Making music is CONTRIBUTING to my income (!).

What a privilege.

Although I already knew, and it’s small, seeing it on official documents felt like a milestone moment. I’m actually doing the thing I have worked so hard for.

I’ve always struggled with anything to do with feeling pride or a sense of achievement. But watching all of these athletes has inspired me to take a moment to reflect.

It was a strange and unfamiliar feeling to let myself sit with the accomplishment.

I know I’m not exactly at an ‘Olympic’ level - I still feel like there are a lot of things I’d like to do as a musician/producer.

But, I did it. And tbh it was amazing lol.

Being an artist in 2024, especially a smaller artist, is weird. This industry feels so broken, and there is a necessity to participate in ways that feel so unnatural, or difficult to do in an authentic way.

It feels fickle to create, let alone send something into the ether, to add to the noise.

I’ll be sitting with Chloe, or my family and all of a sudden an unstoppable wave of anxiety will wash through me.

“Oh shit.. I better tell everyone about the little ditty I made.
Can’t let all that energy go to waste”

Then a second wave comes through…

“HEY EVERYONE!
LOOK OVER HEAR, LOOK AT ME!
TAKE YOUR EYES OFF YOUR EXISTENTIAL CRISIS FOR A MOMENT.
WHILE ALL OF THESE AWFUL THINGS ARE HAPPENING…
I MADE A SONG ABOUT ME! (out now on all streaming platforms)”

Constantly doing mental gymnastics (heyy another Olympics reference!) between feeling privileged to be creating art, and having a responsibility to use the ONE shot we get to make a life worth living.

It is crippling.

So, as a way of trying to appreciate the ups, downs, and weirdness of the way I have chosen to pursue a happy life, I plan to write a little something each week(ish) to share my journey as a person, artist, and producer.

For now, if anyone else has a strategy that helps them deal with all of these conflicting thoughts. Hit me up in the comments below, I need your help.

If you’ve made it this far, and plan to come back, Thank you.

You’ll hear from me soon.